Pregnancy {The Big Surprise}

     

We look tranquil. But we were scared out of our minds!
Photo Credit: Jurina Photography

It was a normal day. It seems to me that the days with the biggest life-moments always start out as just the most mundane of days. Like when my husband (finally) told me he loved me... I was sick, in bed and with no voice. Talk about mundane! But yet it changed the course of our relationship. The day he proposed? A school day.... you don't get more so-so than that! And the day I found out I was pregnant was a totally normal and boring weekday... until of course that Mack truck drove through and completely ran me over.

It was summer break. Oh glorious, stress-free, summer break! 
I was doing what I always do: 

Cleaning. 

Not true... I'm usually exercising. 

Haha that last one was comical. I'm usually watching TV.

But not on this July day! The husband and I had been bouncing around the idea of putting our house on the market to sell it so I was starting the process of going through all of our stuff. I had been feeling a little off for days with flu-like symptoms and didn't understand how that could be in July! The internet informed that these flu-like symptoms were a sign of Pregnancy! 

Uh... can't flu-symptoms just be a sign of the flu and not some life-changing thing like pregnancy?

Let me just say though... in my internet wanderings I have learned EVERYTHING could be a symptom of pregnancy... itchy skin, mood swings, nausea, the flu, hair growth, being tired... I could be pregnant right now for crying out loud! (I'm not!)

 I digress.

So as I had done many times before when pregnancy-panick came around... with a business-as-usual attitude I took a pregnancy test, laid it on the bathroom counter, went back to cleaning and forgot about it! That was 9 a.m.

I cleaned, organized, cut my finger, ate lunch, watched an episode (or 6) of Law and Order (that thing sucks you in!) and cleaned some more. Sometime mid-afternoon the only thing left to do was clean the bathroom!

Cleaning the bathroom is never a good idea, let's just start there! Crazy things happen when you clean the bathroom... and on this day... the craziest  event of all happened.

I walked in, ready to scrub-a-dub and there it was, on the counter, staring at me. That flimsy, little pregnancy test. The one I had completely forgotten about was just laying there. 

Two beady, little eyes (read: pink lines of responsibility) stared me straight in the face, mocking my irresponsible forgetfulness!

The flu symptoms got a little stronger at that moment... one in particular.

I just stared for a long time. Then it began... you know... that glow, the beaming, the overflow of joy that just fills your heart when you find out? It's that moment when birds start singing and the sun shines through the window. You start day dreaming of little feet and tiny hands, cute little smiles, hair-bows or maybe bow-ties! 

Yeah that's not what happened. 
Not even close.
I picked my jaw up off the floor and I cried. Not a whimper, not a sniffle with a smile breaking through it, oh no folks, it was an ugly cry! 

I didn't know what else to do. I truly didn't feel there was anything else I could do. We weren't ready, my husband had reminded me of that every time I talked about having a baby.

We.were.not.ready.
should I hashtag that to emphasize? 
hashtag wewerentready

Funny how our misguided concept of "ready" is foolishness to an all-knowing, sovereign God. He knew what we were ready for.... or actually what would push us to lean on Him more and less on ourselves!

I would like to tell you that I called my husband to share the news with him first as a good wife should.

But I can't say that. 

I called my friend Gretchen who just so happened to be pregnant as well. (I'm pretty sure though she DID have that light-streaming, day-dreaming, smile-inducing reaction to her news... but you can read more on that here.)

 She popped first into my head... no rational thought accompanied that though... it was all just blubber and "call Gretchen".  

As soon as her sweet, unsuspecting voice picked up on the other end, the ugly cry came back with a vengeance! I couldn't even breathe let alone explain the reason for my call. Poor thing thought I was bleeding out from that little cut on my finger earlier. (Remember? Part of a mundane day?)  She keeps asking what's wrong and I just keep on crying. She's putting on her shoes getting ready to come to my rescue until finally it escaped my lips:

 "I'm Pregnant!"

Everything froze. I hear her movements stop, then a laugh and then with a smile in her voice she sweetly says

"that's wonderful!"

Wonderful!? Wonderful!? Did she hear me right? Doesn't she know how NOT READY we are? She's rejoicing and I'm wiping snot off my face.

In her wisdom she encourages me to calm down, pray and wait for Greg to come home.

Friends are good. I like friends!

4:00 p.m
Greg finally comes home from work. I am sitting on the couch in the back room of our house and I hear him enter... I just wait. I couldn't speak. Plus, I figured there are only a few rooms to pick from, he'll find me eventually! We had a little frame that we always rarely wrote each other sweet love notes.

 Today's note was by far the most epic to date:

He reads it... looks at me... reads it again... looks at me... reads it again.
freezes

 "Is this... is this for real?"

Having taken at least 3 more pregnancy tests to assure myself of my new reality...  
I nod. 

Cue ugly cry reprise.

My dear, wonderful, strong and supportive husband does everything a girl hopes he will do. Holds her, tells her this is wonderful news and that he loves her.

Thanks, God. 
I needed him.

It was an ordinary day... but our lives would never be the same!

And since none of us have any patience, Gretchen brought Clayton over that night so we could tell him the news about our little "poppy seed". The photo below was obviously a little later in the journey, but we are so grateful to God for his grace that we could all experience and walk this road together as friends! 

By God's grace in their lives these 2 men are such wonderful fathers!

(ohhhh the photo-caption possibilities!)

Sweet memories of the start of a whole new life for us. 

In our feeble understanding and view of what our life should be - we were not ready.

But...

 Isaiah 55:8 NIV
"...my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD."
 

 True Statement!